Lux just brought to my attention a post on Gawker (tagged “shut up”) that made me want to vomit. It’s about how we have enough sex writers/bloggers and that, since sex bloggers have totally accomplished the goal of making everyone on Earth comfortable with talking about sex, they should all shut up and go home. The transparent implication/simplification is that 1) most sex bloggers are women and 2) said women should leave the writin’ to the mens who have something more important to say.
From the post: Hey, ladies? We did it. We broke through the glass ceiling: we’re all comfortable discussing sex now.
Does anyone else find that little remark insulting, belittling and, well, dead wrong on every count?
(What about this new major study on the pay gap between men and women in university faculty? How about the pay gap between male and female JDs? What glass ceiling?)
If we’re all so comfortable discussing sex now, if it’s no big deal, then why berate people who want to do so online? Why not say, “We have a lot of political bloggers too–I mean come on, people, political blogging is so played out, there’s nothing more to say, right?”
Well, Gawker would never say that, would they, because we can all agree that politics is continually interesting, ever changing and something broad and important that shapes our lives. Of course there’s always more to say. But because sex writing is generally the province of female writers, it’s “girly” and brainless and irrelevant. I wonder, if more male writers decided to pursue sex blogging would we be hearing about how courageous and taboo-smashing they are?
Women tend to write more about their feelings and relationships than men do–we’re encouraged to verbalize and emote more from birth–and teen girl bloggers and social internet users outnumber teen male bloggers. It seems natural and good to me that with the inclusion of more young female voices comes a shift in the dominant discourse to include more cultural discussion of things that have long been considered “feminine” topics, like relationships and yes, sex.
So no, Gawker. We will not all shut up and go home.
Articles containing some good social media stats:
Pew Internet on Teens and Social Media
NY Times on teen girls and social media
April 4th, 2008 - 12:31 pm
It’s like the Lou Dobbs argument on racism applied to sex. All problems in this field have been solved! There’s no reason to discuss them any further! If you’re talking about the issue it’s you who are making the problem, trouble-maker.
In general, it’s a version of The End Of History argument. History is over. Power structures have ossified permanently. No future change can occur. Everybody settle down and like it.
April 4th, 2008 - 12:41 pm
Now im really wondering why there aren’t more men sex writers? I honestly can’t think of one, well maybe Dan Savage but I don’t know if that counts because his is a question column.
April 4th, 2008 - 3:46 pm
Corben, is it true that there aren’t male sex writers? Perhaps we just think of them as “writers.” Plenty of men have written about sex. Could it be that a certain style of writing about sex and relationships is more commonly feminine–not the subject itself?
April 4th, 2008 - 5:40 pm
You realize Gawker Media is now in the “ZOMG OUTRAGE!!!!1″ business, don’t you? Literally, it’s pageviews-uber-alles over there.
This post, your pissed-offness, and the “a href” above just put a few bucks “Sheila’s” pocket, who will track her pageviews back to this post and cackle with glee than her purposefully offensive unbylined asshattery paid off exactly as planned. You’re underwriting what you most hate. Expect it to get worse.
April 4th, 2008 - 7:29 pm
Yes, I understand how Gawker works, and what you point out did in fact cross my mind. I’d rather speak my piece though. “What I most hate” is closer to self-censorship than having people say things I disagree with. (Terrible grammar but you know what I mean.)
April 14th, 2008 - 9:06 am
Someone forgot that the massive landmass outside the two coasts is populated by people.